The “But Sentence"

We all know the "but sentence", the lousy attempt at feedback that ends up being more annoying than it actually is helping. Like getting a chocolate bar that’s full of salty filling inside — it teases you with a tasty treat only to disappoint you in the end, leaving a bad taste afterwards too. Never mind that chocolate bars with salty filling don't exist (maybe that's why), the "but sentence" is hardly a wining formula for giving feedback. Yet few things in life are perfect and there is often room for improvement, so banishing “but” altogether isn’t probably a good idea either. How about flipping the “but sentence” around then, such that we would mention the negative bit up front and follow up with the positive stuff? For example, instead of saying “I like your presentation but you could have used less slides” we could say “You could have used less slides but I like your presentation”. Doesn't that sound better? It could be that simple — the "but sentence” goes first, and all the goodness follows afterwards. The end result of this chop and change could be that those on the receiving end get to keep their egos warm and cosy plus the added bonus of knowing what they could do better next time. More importantly, you could get your point across.